I love you so much I could eat you. I absolutely love this statement. It encapsulates perfectly our innate desire to infinitely expand. I’m sure many people can relate to this line. It’s a favorite among relatives and loved ones. Many of us can recall an overzealous aunt pinching our cheeks, a doting mother smothering us with kisses, or even a proud grandmother squeezing us until we’re sure we’ll suffocate. Some similar quotes: “I’m going to eat your little toes and or fingers. I love you so much, I can’t stand it. You complete me. You’re so adorable I just want to hug you to death.” The list goes on. In the award winning children’s story “Where the Wild Things Are,” there is a famous quote that mimics this sentiment. The wild things are pleading with Max not to leave. They say, “Oh please don’t go – we’ll eat you up – we love you so!”
I found an article that attempts to explain, from a scientific standpoint, why one would say such a thing to someone we love. The author’s premise: making a negative statement balances out the overwhelmingly positive emotion. When one is overcome with such an emotion as love there is an immediate need to counter it such that it brings us back to a homeostasis, an emotional equilibrium if you will. I encourage you to read the article and examine the ideas for yourself. The author’s perspective hinges on two ideas: firstly, that eating something results in an undesirable change and secondly, something that isn’t desirable is negative or bad. I propose that eating results in a necessary change which I will discuss in more detail, and negative and bad are values that we assign. In reality, there is no such thing as good or bad and negative and positive. These are our own projections.
Lets look more closely at the statement, “I love you so much I could eat you.” Love is an extremely powerful emotion. In fact, all sentient beings operate from a position of love. However, there are varying degrees of awareness or consciousness associated with each person’s perspective and so it may not always be readily apparent. Love is the pinnacle emotion, the state most sought after. Its vibration lends itself to tremendous change. When we love, we are open to what is; we are receptive and accepting. Love instills in us the courage to be who we are. It affords us the opportunity to see the magnificence that is life.
To eat something is to take it into our body and allow it to become part of us. In western culture, the body is considered us, the physical representation of who we think we are. Since the act of eating is necessary for the survival of that which we love, ourselves, we must also love the nourishment we take in. Generally speaking, we only eat that which we consider necessary in some way so there must be an element of trust associated with our food. Food is not some inanimate thing that exists solely for the purpose of keeping us alive. Rather we have a relationship with food; we trust that it will nourish us and allow us to survive. Conversely, it trusts that we will use it to become part of us and ultimately allow it to become more than what it once was.
The natural state of life is unity and love for what is. Lets take the most basic example of mother and child. I use the word mother as primary caretaker without attaching the concept of male or female to it. A child instinctually loves its mother figure because the mother is the source of life and survival. As children, we may find it difficult to leave our mother’s side. Exploring the world without Mother seems daunting and risky. We crave our mother’s approval. Before taking action we may look to Mother to see if it is the right move, or even acceptable. Those initial stages where we form a separate identity from Mother are always trying. They are emotionally and physically difficult because we are splitting off from our base instinct of union. This is the fundamental reason adolescence is such a painful and difficult time.
At the other end of the spectrum, as adults, we search for love outwardly and may find it in another. We learn to trust and appreciate what that person has to offer. In doing so we integrate their values, beliefs, and traits into our own. Ultimately, we seek to merge with our beloved such that our sense of self incorporates them. A couple that is in sync functions as a cohesive unit. They think alike, act alike, finish each other’s sentences, etc. Their union has allowed something to emerge that would not be possible otherwise. This is key to any healthy relationship.
The journey of life is predicated upon expansion and unity. The more we experience, the hungrier we get. When our consciousness reaches a certain point, we see that everything is one. Its all us, and we love it so. It is then that we can begin to dissolve our identification as a separate self and merge in love with all that is. Its inescapable that along the way we will eat that which we love.